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Ronan Woods Humphrey and James Thomas Humphrey

Ro and JT Memorial Trees in Glazebrook Park

5/26/2018 5:54:19 AM  "Oh piffleberries! She's gone." I loved my Grandma very much but not as much as she loved me, my sister, my cousin, my wife, my children, her sons, her husband, her brothers and sisters, her parents, her friends, her church, her neighbors, and life. She was a wonderful, wonderful person and I'm fortunate to have learned from her for 47 years. Ada "Evelyn" Humphrey PEORIA — Ada "Evelyn" (Stauffer) Humphrey, 96, of Peoria, who passed away on Wednesday, May 23, 2018, at Bickford House of Peoria, was born on Christmas Eve 1921, near Bader, Ill., in rural Schuyler County. She was the fifth and last child of Harve and Ada (Riebling) Stauffer. She grew up on the family farm and attended a one-room grade school. She graduated from Astoria High School in 1939 and moved to Peoria, where she worked as a nanny and later a store clerk. In 1942, she married A.O. "Bud" Humphrey from rural Fulton County whom she had met in high school. They had two sons, Ron (Kathy) Humphrey of Ennis, Mont., and Terry (Sharon) Humphrey of Flippin, Ark. While Bud was employed at Caterpillar, Evelyn took care of the boys and kept house. When the boys were older, Evelyn worked briefly at the USDA Northern Regional Lab. Evelyn grew up in the Church of the Brethren in Astoria, but became a member of the First Presbyterian Church (later United Presbyterian) in Peoria where she served as a Deacon and was active in church quilting and sewing programs. She loved quilting and made quilts for all her grandchildren and great-grandchildren, as well as many other relatives and friends. Evelyn was a member of the Peoria Women's Club, served as a volunteer for the Retired and Senior Volunteer Program (RSVP) for many years through her church mission sewing group and was recognized with the President's Volunteer Service Award in 2002. With her husband and friends and family, she loved going north on fishing trips. After Bud retired, they did extensive travel and she enjoyed seeing the mountains and landmarks all over the country and Canada. Evelyn learned to play the piano as a child and later entertained her friends by playing the organ. Evelyn was a loving wife, mother, aunt and friend. She lived through difficult times as a child during the Great Depression. She was always positive, optimistic and cared deeply for family and friends. In later years while dealing with severe hearing loss, she still remained engaged and involved in her community at the Bickford House of Peoria and with her family. She is predeceased by her parents; brothers Harold and Galen Stauffer; sisters, Velma Leib and Ilo Clifford; her husband, A.O. "Bud" Humphrey; and great-grandsons, Ronan and James Humphrey. She is survived by her sons and their spouses, four grandchildren, eight great-grandchildren, her sister-in-law, Rosemary Trowbridge, and numerous nieces and nephews and their families. Evelyn specified cremation and she will be interred next to her parents at 11:00 a.m. on Wednesday, June 6, 2018, at the South Fulton Cemetery, between Astoria and Bader, where her father maintained the grounds a century ago. The family would like to extend a special thanks to the staff at Bickford House, Vitas Hospice, and her physicians for their compassionate care. In lieu of flowers, memorial donations may be made to the United Presbyterian Church of Peoria. Online condolences may be left for the family at www.thewiltonmortuary.com.

5/1/2011 10:09:28 PM   In spite of all of the rain this past month, we have seemed to manage to get just enough of a break to enjoy most of the events planned to attend. One of those was the annual Arbor Day Celebration at our local park: (Ronan & James Thomas' memorial tree for this year.)

3/26/2011 7:42:31 AM   And at 5:38 p.m., seven years ago today, we met James Thomas Humphrey. He was the bigger and the calmer brother. Funny how as time has gone by we've realized that he was more like Victor (we didn't realize how calm Victor was until there was wild Erick!). He was truly an individualist though in spite of being so mellow. That's how I'll always think of him - trying to do things his own way but not getting too ruffled when it doesn't work out. We miss you JT & Ro. Hugs, kisses and cupcakes!

3/25/2011 12:30:47 PM   It was seven years ago today, at 2:17 p.m., that we got to meet Ronan Woods Humphrey. We've had so many wild and wonderful moments since then and I know in my heart that he set us on this path - the path that led us to Victor & Erick and back home to Illinois. And he's probably watching over the wrestlemania that now occupies our lives with a knowing smile. It's snowing here today but Ro's memorial tree at the park is all budded up and ready for spring. Always the eager one!

1/16/2011 3:08:15 PM   I'm finally getting around to updating things around here. Ironically, today has been the perfect day for it even though James left on a trip to Austin this morning. One would think that I'd have less time for recreational pursuits but actually, I'm making Victor stay down here in the basement so that Erick can get in a good nap and there's not much else to do down here. It's nice to finally take the time to do it though! Post-Christmas has been kind of a strange blur. Almost feels like break has never quite ended, thanks to the snow days we had last week and MLK Day tomorrow. We've been very lucky that the boys stayed pretty healthy through the holidays but I've got a pretty bad cold right now and I have a bad feeling that Erick is getting it too (I'm hearing a lot of sneezing over the monitor today). This next week will hopefully be his first music class for this session. He had to miss the last two classes back in November/December because he was so sick. Weather sounds yucky this next week too so I really, really, really hope he is able to make it so he can get back to having some fun with friends. Little Gym, on the other hand, didn't take any break at all between sessions and it's less of a drive so he hasn't had to miss out on it at all and it's a good thing because he loves, loves, loves it. He's always enjoyed going but was always just a bit cautious about trying things but he's really gotten out there and been more confident recently. He just moved up to "Beasts" (from his previous "Birds" level) and I was afraid that he might be intimidated by being one of the youngest kids but it was actually quite the opposite. Seeing those 2-3 year olds really inspires him to be a daredevil. Grrrrrreat. I'm also really hoping to start taking Erick to storytime at the library regularly, especially now that they do it every week. When we tried it back in the early fall, he just didn't quite have the interest in sitting for stories but he's really come around on that too. He loves to look at his books by himself but he loves to be read to as well. His very favorites are Llama Llama Red Pajama, Fuzzy Fuzzy Fuzzy and Chugga Chugga Choo. He really enjoys any books with textures, pop-ups or trains. The trains. Oh, the trains. Erick is completely obsessed. Much as Victor had his hardcore Thomas phase, Erick is even more crazed about it. Luckily he's gotten a little less rigid about always having to be holding one of his trains (his favorites are Percy, Duncan and Freddie). He loves watching the DVDs and he loves any and all of the paraphernalia. I'm already plotting a Lego Percy set for his birthday. He loves Legos too and is very much a little builder by nature. He's very much a typical rough and tumble boy with a voice that sounds so strangely deep to us (Victor still has his sweet, angelic voice). Erick is talking up a storm. Any concerns we ever had about his language development have certainly gone by the wayside. That is, of course, very bittersweet. At 21 months, Victor might have had 5 words. With Erick, we lost count months ago. He easily has 100+ words and is answering yes/no questions, asking for food/toys by name, calling people by name. He's even forming a few rudimentary sentences. He says a lot of what sounds like sentences, of course, which are really imitations of what he hears all of us say. But he also has said some really novel things lately. The ones that come to mind are "I make kitty mad!" and "Yay! It's cheese.". He's pretty clearly influenced by his big brother. As for the working relationship between those two, it's about half harmonious and half acrimonious. When they are playing together, it's unbelievably sweet, especially the nightly super hero routine. (They put on satin capes and run through the house saying "Let's fly! Go, go, go!"). But Erick is super sensitive to Victor's often overenthusiastic attempts at affection and when Erick feels annoyed by Victor, he screams at the top of his lungs for prolonged amounts of time. We don't remember Victor ever doing this so much but then Victor didn't have an older brother trying to violently hug him all the time. It's a lose-lose situation because Victor is known to agitate Erick just to see him get mad and Erick is, in turn, a huge, melodramatic cry baby about all of it. As you'd expect, he does not react nearly so dramatically when it's any other kid in his space or taking a toy from him. The scream is a special sound just for his brother. Awwww. As for the big brother, Victor is doing great overall. Winter is tough, of course. It's hard to be cooped up and while he loves playing in the snow, even he knows that it's too cold for that here lately. He was incredibly sad about Christmas being over too. It was so cool that he got so into all of it this year and really understood all of the traditions but it made it that much harder to experience the post-holiday letdown. I went ahead and got out all of our Valentine's Day decor to console him with and now I am asked at least once a day if tomorrow is finally Valentine's Day. On the bright side, maybe he'll be interested enough to help me prepare for his class party. I'm sure he'd rather play computer games though. Victor would play computer games all day long if we'd let him. He's completely obsessed with the PBS Kids website and plays games for shows that he's never even watched. A lot of it is mindless but harmless as long as we keep a limit on it. Initially he was spending most of his time playing Word World games and we were excited about that because he finally started to grasp rhyming (rhyming is a terribly hard concept for Victor in spite of the fact that he's an excellent reader overall). Didn't take long until Victor started clicking on all of the other game links and getting to all kinds of crazy games though. On the bright side, his computer skills themselves have vastly improved. His reading is really good although he gets really lazy about it if it's not what he wants to do. Imagine that from a kindergartener! He's doing great at school though, aside from his handwriting (not sure if this issue is a fine motor thing or a visual perceptive thing). That's something we'll be addressing in depth very soon both at school and in his private therapy. He recently switched therapy days (and therapists) and he seems to be responding well to that. Victor definitely has the tendency to burn out on therapy if we don't change up the day and personnel periodically so it's nice to see him with a fresh energy for it. He's really, really made a lot of progress with his feeding therapy and has expanded his food choices greatly. Just today I offered him a cup of yogurt and he ate the entire thing happily. He had not eaten yogurt in probably 3 years! I believe a lot of that is being around other kids in the cafeteria. That and just his overall improvement with his sensory/textural issues. He's still going to swimming once a week and loving it. I think I can safely say that it's still the highlight of the week for him. He adores his teacher and he has gained so much strength, balance and confidence. You know we're convinced that it's great for him when James continues to take him in the coldest part of the winter! He is really almost swimming. Could not have even imagined that a year ago. And he's now two weeks into Rookie Basketball through local Parks & Rec too. Dribbling is quite a struggle (we need to be practicing that more in the sunroom) but he's a good shooter and James said that he is quite adept at the chest pass. He definitely seems more enthusiastic about basketball than he was about soccer (fine by me because I find soccer incredibly boring and tedious). We're really excited about seeing him get more interested in playing sports and doing things with other kids in general. I could go on and on and on about what a year Victor is having but this is already obnoxiously long. I truly am just so thankful that he's got some really great people teaching him, helping him and cheering him on. He's an amazingly sweet, smart boy and while I worry about him endlessly, I am so proud of him and am so excited about what he might be able to start doing next. I'll try to be a lot better about updating the blog about what those next things might be. Oh yeah, and I should mention that Erick is running everywhere. And he's using tools to climb things. See, there's a reason I don't sit down much!

4/25/2010 11:57:34 AM   Yesterday we barely managed to make it through the Arbor Day celebration without getting poured on but we were able to be there for the dedication of Ro & JT's memorial trees. Here are the very few pics I got at the ceremony: Right after I took those pics, the camera flatlined so I was unable to get a pic of the boys together with their brothers' trees (nor of Mimi & Gaga's faces, sadly). Those are the trees in the pics though. It was such a nice ceremony and I really look forward to continuing it every year as a family tradition. I like the idea of Arbor Day being linked to our own remembrance of our first boys. It's all about looking to the future but taking the time to honor the past through doing something for the community (and ourselves!). Those are good lessons for Victor & Erick. And us. We've had a lot of rain. My cucumber plants are looking miraculously better and I planted some lilies from Gaga that I can't wait to see grow. They are starts from the same lilies that were used in my wedding bouquet. Pretty cool. The boys have stayed mostly inside as of late though: And we're beginning our sad 6 days without Daddy. Victor doesn't seem like it quite gets it yet but I've got his picture schedule up in the kitchen to count down the days and nights until Daddy's return. So far he's just fixated on the picture of bowling pins (I promised him we'd go to the bowling alley in the next few days.........and frankly, I'm pleased that he even recognized my artist's rendition of pins) and asking exactly when we'll be doing that!

4/23/2010 2:36:47 PM   Poor E. He spiked a fever yesterday morning and I thought it was probably a reaction to the MMR vaccine (Dr. L subscribed to that theory as well). But he's just been so fussy and seemingly uncomfortable so I took him to get the ears rechecked since we're heading into a weekend. And yep, they're still infected. First time he ever takes an antibiotic and he's resistant to it (in this case at least). So now he's got Zithromax. Meanwhile, Victor finished his 20 days of Augmentin and is naturally starting to cough again. I'm thinking that he should probably never leave the house again! I was completely bummed because we were supposed to have a day of fun with Heather, Chris, Jack & Bern today. And today was already a reschedule of our outing we had planned for spring break when Victor was so sick. Victor has, however, thoroughly enjoyed his day off school (teacher's institute today) by playing in the playroom and generally being Daddy's shadow. He is on such a Daddy kick lately and I'm glad he got to really enjoy it today because James will be gone for 5 days starting on Sunday. Don't ask me how I'll survive that because I haven't figured it out yet. Lately Victor gets weepy when James leaves for tennis practice so I'm sure he'll be beside himself for a day or so, probably standing at the window watching for Daddy's car with a terribly forlorn look. Tomorrow we have the memorial tree dedication at the park. It's a rain or shine event and it looks like there will be very little shining but a lot of raining. I'm inclined to go no matter what because this is our special family tradition for James Thomas & Ronan now but I'm a bit leery of taking Victor so near the playscape if it's too wet to play. I don't want him to think that I'm torturing him by dangling that carrot in front of him with no payoff. We shall see. I'm looking forward to the rain in general though. Just got everything planted for the spring and I'm eager to see things looking greener and happier. So far so good except for my poor cucumber plants.

3/26/2010 2:14:10 PM   And today is James Thomas Humphrey's birthday. We met him at 5:38 p.m. six years ago today. Hard to believe it's been that long since we got to see those sweet little cheeks of his. The sun is out after many, many hours of rain yesterday so I guess it's time for the party to begin. Thinking of the twins today and every day. But especially on their birthday weekend. :)

3/25/2010 3:36:57 PM   It was six years ago today at 2:17 p.m. that Ronan Woods Humphrey was born. So much has happened since then, a whole lot of it wonderful. He is so missed each and every day though. Happy birthday, sweet Ro.

3/4/2010 8:59:11 PM   First of all, thank you very much to all of you out there who have asked about our March of Dimes campaign for this year. I sincerely apologize for not being more forthcoming about that but we were really kind of on the fence about what we were going to do. Turns out that the walks in both St. Louis and in Edwardsville are on the same day as the regional tennis tourney that James's boys will be playing in here in town. So he wouldn't be able to go. I tried to get used to the idea of doing it without him but then I quickly realized that my heart didn't feel totally in it since we don't have any ties to the local chapters. We're not doing it this year and I don't think that we're probably going to do it in the future as our official family tradition of honoring Ronan Woods and James Thomas. We may do the walk again in future years and we wholeheartedly support the efforts of the March of Dimes and we encourage all of our friends and family to contribute to those efforts. It really does sadden me to not be participating but the truth is that I want to participate in Austin and that's not at all feasible right now. Our new family tradition, starting this year, is our local Arbor Day celebration. (Ironically, it's also on the same day -April 24- as the tennis tourney but at least it's less than a mile away so James will surely be able to swing a brief attendance.) When we were still in Austin, we planted a tree each year on the boys' birthday weekend. Our yard here is considerably smaller and planting more trees right now would clutter up the landscaping. As it turns out, we can purchase memorial trees to be dedicated and planted at the Arbor Day celebration each year. The coolest part is that they can be planted in the park we can practically see from our yard. The park where we take the boys. Pretty cool. So I think we've found a way to honor Victor & Erick's brothers while teaching them about giving to their community. I just like the thought of them playing there in the park amongst their brothers' trees as they grow up. I'm actually hoping that we can get the boys to the park this weekend because it sounds like we will finally have warm enough weather for it (barely). Victor has gotten to play outside at school for the past few days but I know he'll still be ecstatic to go to the park. I'm pretty sure Erick might be ready to try out swinging now too. Here he is recently in Victor's therapy swing in the basement: He did some swinging today too, at his first Play Pals meeting of the session: Sadly, he spent most of the 45 minutes looking kind of like this: Baby boy was tired this morning! He must have been awake earlier than I realized or something because usually 9:00 is a really perky time for him. He made the most of it though: And then he crashed hard once we were home again: The thumb sucking is getting more and more prevalent, clearly.

12/30/2009 11:17:12 PM   Happy 60th to PopPaw, first of all! I had the rare and special honor/treat of having dinner with PopPaw and Mimi sans boys tonight. I initially felt weird about them not sharing in PopPaw's birthday celebration but it was truly such a treat to get to hang out with my parents and have real conversations (and wine!). It is such a blessing to be able to share all of our special moments and celebrations now. Every time I start to feel homesick for Austin I remind myself of that. Here's to many more splendid birthday celebrations, Daddy/PopPaw. You are so very loved and I am giddy that I get to see you so much these days! Speaking of loved ones, I'm feeling very pensive/nostalgic/wistful tonight but not in a negative or horrible way. Wine will do that to you anyway and the holidays will certainly do that. Throw into the mix that I saw an obit for one of Grandpa's (Great PopPaw's) fellow Lions/Legionnaires and I am just finding myself missing some very special people in my life that aren't here with us anymore. Obviously that includes my dear, sweet Grandpa. Just thinking of his legion comrades (I CANNOT see those guys doing their thing and not be moved to tears. Just impossible.) took me back to his funeral and I'm amazed at how much time has already passed. I miss him so much and I find myself wishing that we had moved back sooner so that I'd had more time with him, even if he was mentally deteriorating for so very many years. I just miss holding his hand. I can remember few feelings in my life more comforting than holding his hand. Last time I got to do that was December 25, 2007. Now there are many achievements in my life of which I am proud (two of which are sleeping soundly upstairs) but one of my very proudest moments was at my grandpa's visitation when several of the legionnaires came through the line and one of them remarked at how I was "that little girl that helped Paul put out the flags every year". I've talked about that ritual here on the blog several times and I won't toot my own Taps horn too much more than necessary. Suffice it to say though that I felt such a swell of pride to overhear that those old timers remembered me from 30 years ago. I didn't realize at the time that I was doing something that meant so much to Grandpa. I just knew it was a special honor and that I liked getting to walk around in the sunshine with him. Yep, sometimes even holding his hand. I'm sad to see another of his Legion buddies go but it served to remind me that I'm truly humbled to have gotten to bear witness to the special bond that those men have shared through their many rich years. Also, while I haven't really talked about them much lately, James Thomas and Ronan Woods have been very much on my mind throughout the season. I do realize that it may be hard for people to understand how I can miss them so much at the holidays when they never spent any holidays here with us. It's pretty hard to explain, I suppose. If you've given birth to a child that isn't with you anymore, you understand and if you understand, I'm very sorry. In simplest terms, I can only describe it as that there's just a piece of me that's gone with them. I love the holidays and this was by far the most beautiful and blessed season I can remember ever having but the more my heart fills with joy and light and love, the more aware I am of the hole left behind. I'm not sad but I'm not whole either. I learn to accept it a little more each year and I learn to stop blaming myself a little more each year and I learn to let go a little more each year (though it hurts so much to feel my memories of them getting vaguer) but I'm not the same person. And that's OK. But it's there and the holidays make it more apparent. To me, anyway. But with all of that said, I feel so thankful to be close to my family again, to include some of my oldest and dearest friends in my extended "family", and especially to have a warm home full of laughter and mayhem where I wake up every day to three wonderful guys. For all that I miss, my blessings really are overabundant and I know it. Tonight above all else, I'm thankful for my daddy and thankful that my boys get to have PopPaw come over to laugh at their antics and take them on sled rides. Happy birthday to him and happy (almost) new year to everyone!

3/26/2009 8:34:13 AM   Happy Birthday to James Thomas Humphrey! He was born on this day five years ago at 5:38. Since he was born a whole 27 hours after his brother Ro, we spent most of his birthday trying to rally and it broke our hearts when it didn't work. But JT came into the world with such a sense of composure and calm that we could only feel that he knew what he was doing and that all would be right. We've always thought of him as the most pragmatic member of our family (making his name all the more appropriate). I think of that part of his spirit often when I'm trying to hold it all together and I'm thankful that I got to see that in him during his very short life. Thinking of you today and always, James T. And thank you.

3/25/2009 4:42:57 AM   Five years ago today our first son, Ronan Woods Humphrey, was born. So much has happened in those five years and it's surreal to even think that we're about to have our fourth son. But in so many ways, it feels like we were just kissing Ro goodbye and memorizing his sweet face to carry it in our hearts forever. Our hearts have healed immensely, mainly due to the joy and laughter that his brother Victor has brought into our lives, but I miss him a lot. And especially today. I want today to always be his day and his day alone and I'm pretty certain it will stay that way. I think a visit to the twins' spot will be waiting until a more logistically appropriate time but I do take comfort in knowing that we're back in IL with them and I'm so glad that we brought them here when we did. So for today, we'll just forge ahead toward at least Friday, with Ronan foremost in our thoughts. That will be especially true at 2:17, the time when we first heard his little voice. Happy Birthday Ronan. It's your day.

3/22/2009 2:47:09 PM   We've had a nice weekend. Perhaps our last as a family of 3. We got a lot done though and still managed to enjoy a little bit of fun, particularly an overindulgent crab leg dinner last night. (I'm lucky I didn't go into labor or else I would have been throwing up everywhere). Victor has spent most of today being Daddy's faithful minion for trips to both Home Depot and Lowe's. Right now he's watching Daddy out the window. Best to keep him away from Daddy's pickaxing, after all. For Ronan & James Thomas's tree planting this year, we're just replacing an arborvitae that was lost over the winter. We don't yet know enough about our yard and what it could really use to intelligently orchestrate a new planting right now. But again, it's the act of doing a planting anyway. I do fear that this might be the extent of our birthday celebrations for the boys this week. I had so wanted to get up to Gaga's to visit "the ampitheater" (which is the spot where their ashes were scattered) but I'm on the fence about both traveling that far and trudging through tall grass on potentially damp ground. We're playing that one by ear. It kinda breaks my heart to not be there on one of their days now that it's finally geographically feasible but I suppose it could wait until Easter or Memorial Day and still be meaningful. I just already feel weird enough about sitting out March of Dimes fundraising and walking this year (we WILL be back next year though). Extenuating circumstances though. I hope that Victor is OK for school tomorrow and I'm reasonably optimistic that he will be. He has had some major tummy issues over the past 4 days or so and has been on a applesauce, green bean and roll diet today as a result. I know he'll be crushed if he's not school-ready tomorrow but so far, so good today. I'm really hoping that he won't need to miss any school once Erick comes too. That all depends on the timing, etc., but we can probably make it all work through the trinity of authorized "guardians": Mimi, Gaga & Auntie Heav. And he can start taking the bus home probably by a week from tomorrow. That will help SO much! Hopefully he'll like it as much as we think he probably will.

3/6/2009 2:19:24 PM   There's been a lot going on but I've had very little energy to update. I go to the OB twice a week now because my blood pressure continues to be slightly worrisome. Not to the point that we'll have to induce early (hopefully) but to the point that we're having to watch it closely. Next week I'll get a growth ultrasound so that we can make sure Erick's ready in case he needs to come pre-37 weeks and I'll probably have to go to L&D to get monitored too, just to make sure he's tolerating the few contractions I'm having. And I'll also have bloodwork while I'm there to rule out preeclampsia, just to be on the safe side. I'm still measuring a week ahead so we're all quite confident that his growth is unaffected by my blood pressure situation. So we're shooting for 3 more weeks so that he'll be full term and won't have to go over to St. Louis. I don't know if we're going to make it to diamond birthstone (April). And I'm growing to accept that Erick might be born in the same month as Ronan & James Thomas. As for Victor, he's had an outstanding week. As violently angry as we are about his private therapy being completely cut off (though as of today, we have slightly more hope about insurance rectifying this), he's been dealing so well with transitions lately. He's continuing to enjoy his weekly Friday playdates with his Gaga (she generously comes to babysit while I go to the doctor each Friday). He's thriving at school and I could not be prouder of how eager he is to please by doing all that is asked of him. When I drop him off now, it's just "Bye Mommy. Seeyouwato!" and right down to business. And the pottying is going splendidly. He pees on the potty probably 5 or 6 times per day now and we generally only have 1 wet Pull-Up to change per day. He will not yet do it at school though but that's no biggie. He'll get more comfortable with that. Most importantly, he's just pretty darned pleased with life and is being so affectionate and usually reasonable (with exceptions, of course). I'm savoring this because I know that he might get a bit out of sorts before long. The boys are off to the park to enjoy this gorgeous afternoon and I'm going to follow medical advice and get the heck off my feet. Hoping to do a lot of that this weekend. The next 3 weeks will go by soon enough! Oh, and here's a montage of the park action (added much later): Thanks for taking all of the pics, James. I got to rest but still experience Victor's glee about being outside. Bliss all around.

12/10/2008 9:06:24 AM   This is a strange week for me. At the holidays, my thoughts always turn to Ronan & James, even moreso than usual, just because it's a natural time to really feel their absence and reflect on how old they'd be now, what they'd enjoy this season, and whatnot. But now here I am staring down "the week", the big foreboding 22, as in the point in my pregnancy when they were born. It's not as scary as it was last time. It's a little scary but mostly it's extremely surreal. Last month, I picked up the newest collection of poems by Sharon Olds. She's a poet near and dear to my heart because she was first introduced to me early in college by a professor with whom I had a love-hate relationship (because she pushed me to go outside my comfort zone, something I later thanked her for). And lo and behold, the very first poem in the new collection and the title poem, "Everything", spoke to me so profoundly. It is a poem about losing a child and it describes the experience in such a non-pitying and beautiful way. And so, I'll let her speak for me on this one (this is only the second half of the poem): "......And many of us, sea-fruit on its stem, dreaming kelp and whelk, are culled in our early months. And some who are born live only for minutes, others for two, or for three, summers, or four, and when they go, everything goes --- the earth, the firmament --- and love stays, where nothing is, and seeks." Onward and outward.

5/9/2008 11:24:39 AM   Best kept secret for spring-so-freaking-hot-it-feels-like-summer splashing fun? Still our good ol' public pool with its mercifully unpublicized off season hours that only devoted lap swimmers seem to know about. We were once again the only splashers there yesterday. We'll enjoy that pool while we can because in a few weeks, it will go back to being a hotbed of scum. Because let's face it, most people are messy and inconsiderate (Again, there's no great mystery as to where Victor's "yuck!" issues come from - it's just a question of which of his parents contributes more squeamishness). Worst kept secret? Brushy Creek sprinklers. At 10:15 this morning (we sped up there after OT, so starved for cool water that I justified paying the tolls to get there more quickly), there were not only a gazillion preschoolers there but there was also a school bus full of preteens. It was brutal. Victor cooled off in the water a bit but he was so not digging that scene. And much as I was smiling and saying "Come on, let's splash some more!", with my mind I was telling him "Dude, I feel ya. I loathe these people too!". Here are the precious few shots I was able to snap amidst the chaos: I know I've been uncharacteristically quiet this week but it's been a bit of a rough one. Victor has been really "off" for a good portion of the week, less talkative even than is usual for him and exhibiting some really worrisome spectrumy behaviors. We're cutting his yogurt back out of his diet and hoping to catch him up on some missed sleep. And meanwhile, I've just been really emotional about this weekend. It's both our last March of Dimes walk and our last Mother's Day in Austin and that's really started to get to me. I'm so excited about having MD with family next year but I still feel like I'm having to leave a piece of Ronan & James Thomas behind after this and that pains me greatly. I've been so preoccupied and overtired this week that when I, at one point, saw a recumbent bike rider on the street, I thought it was a monkey on a small bike. And that didn't register as abnormal to me until about 10 seconds later! Yeah, I'm a little fried. The week hasn't been without high points though. Victor had a fabulous time at music this week (really responded to the song rotation this week), acting much like himself. And last night marked a very significant achievement. Victor hung out at his buddy John's house for a little preschooler house party while the parents all went out to celebrate Ruth's 30th. We all had a great time, though the late night had Victor dragging a bit this morning: And just for fun, here's a pic of our little showman gearing up for the new season of "So You Think You Can You Dance?" with a little costume creation: Big stuff on tap for this weekend. Count on March for Babies pics after tomorrow! It's gonna be a scorcher again this year. And THAT I won't miss.

3/26/2008 7:25:45 AM   And this special little man showed us his beautiful face in much more detail than this at 5:38 p.m., 4 years ago today: Yep, it's Happy Birthday to James Thomas Humphrey! From the get-go, he was always our good-natured, patient, even-keeled guy and I think he still embodies those qualities more than any of the rest of us. Here's our very first encounter with Mr. JT at 7 weeks gestation: (posing with Ronan) And here are the prints of the little feet at the end of his trademark muscular legs: (The pics are deceiving but his feet were actually considerably larger than Ro's.) Here's hoping that our boys are having a rollicking good time together, as always. I know a certain brother that will happily have some cake on their behalf! Mimi is on her way here right now for some springtime fun with Victor and to help us plant the boys' tree this year. 4 years ago, she flew in on this same day and she was the only person that got to hold and meet both boys. So it's a very special treat to have her here on this day again.

3/25/2008 12:00:49 AM   4 years ago, at 2:17 p.m., we met the boy that left these footprints: (not even close to scale) Happy Birthday to one Mr. Ronan Woods Humphrey! Ro would be proud of his brother's feistiness for certain. Oh how we miss Ro and think of him often, always with a smile (and perhaps an exclamation of "That little stinkle!"). Here are a few moments of our first encounters with Ronan: (that guy next to him is James Thomas) Our first sweet, handsome boy. This is his day.

4/27/2007 8:12:01 PM   First of all, happy 2nd birthday to Mr. John Daniel Connell! I just cannot believe that our little gang of playmates is already starting to turn into -gasp- preschoolers. Hope you had a fun day today, little buddy. See you soon. Not much Victor news to report but wanted to give an update on WalkAmerica. We have obliterated last year's fundraising record and surpassed our goal. Thank you so much to all of you who have donated! The walk is still 2 weeks away so there's still plenty of time to donate or join us on the course. We are especially looking forward to seeing the boys' memorial towers this year. Just this week they were offered to us through the generosity of local corporate sponsors. We gave a lot of thought to the passages we included on Ro & JT's posters and we will be so touched and honored to see their names in writing as we stroll along Congress Avenue. We're going to Waco tomorrow. No seriously, we really are. We're making a journey to the Cameron Park Zoo. Just enough distance to feel like a getaway. I'm sure there will be pictures.

3/26/2007 9:49:23 AM   And Happy Birthday to James Thomas Humphrey! Victor is marking the occasion today by actually taking completely voluntary sips out of his sippy cup. I give James Thomas full credit for that one. He was going to be such a persistent and diligent llittle do-er and I have little doubt that he has inspired his brother to consider drinking like a big boy. Thanks Sweet Baby James. :) Happy birthday.

3/25/2007 9:11:37 PM   Another action-packed weekend has passed and boy, are we tired. A big, big thank you goes out to Uncle John for flying in and being a huge part of Ro & JT's birthday weekend festivities. James had an outstanding but draining performance (draining enough to necessitate a trip to the medical tent) in the Cap 10. Uncle John, Victor & myself? We just tried to have fun and survive the six miles. Here are a few pics of us pre-race. The other big activity for the day was planting a new tree for the twins. James & John did a fabulous job and even seemed to have fun breaking apart all of the rock that lurks just inches under the soil in our yard. Here's a pic of the new tree (a red maple) and also a pic of it side by side with the original trees we planted for Ro & JT in 2004 (a bald cyprus and a Chinese pistache). And of course there is a pic of Victor admiring the foliage on his brothers' new tree. It's turning out to be a nice family tradition. We are all officially exhausted and are looking forward to getting up at a normal time tomorrow after today's 7:15 departure. James may be a morning person but Victor & I just really aren't.

3/25/2007 6:25:28 AM   Happy Birthday to Ronan Woods Humphrey! We still miss him so much every day but we see so much of him in his brother, especially in some of the wilder moments, and it makes our enjoyment of Victor's antics that much more special. We're set for a busy, wacky day but this day is above all else about our Ro.

12/5/2006 8:52:11 PM   We managed to get into the holiday spirit reasonably early this year and even have our tree up. Our tree seems to shrink every year and we're now down to a 3 footer. We went fake this year which we really kinda hated to do but it was necessary to avoid Victor eating pieces of tree and the poor tree drying up while we were traveling. So we have a little tabletop tree in the room formerly known as the dining room (and now known as the playroom with the really nice furniture). Here are some pics. I'm including the china cabinet because it is decked out, including our most cherished ornaments: ornaments for Victor's first and second Christmases, Pru's cat ornament, and most especially, Ronan & James Thomas's engraved snowflakes. This is my first time adding the pictures to the blog myself and for the record, I find it to be a giant pain. I'll get better at it though. I guess it's still easier than nagging James all the time.

8/9/2006 2:07:40 PM   The de-Poohification of Victor's room is going well. His bedroom is really coming together and reflecting his personality more now. Lots of bright colors and alphabet and animal stuff. Feels a lot more cheerful in there and thus appropriate for Mr. Smiley. I think all traces of Pooh have been removed and packed up now with the exception of James and Ronan's Pooh letters (they're these cute little carved letters spelling out their names) and I'm having a very, very hard time convincing myself to take them down. It's Victor's room though and his brothers will still be a part of it even without their letters on display. It's just the last tangible memento I have to pack away and I'm finding it hard to let go and I'm dreading digging out their memory boxes. It's kind of a big moment for both of us as Victor's room becomes more of a big boy room and I let go of all of the baby decor from the past 3 years. We're both growing up! Victor even gets his first salon haircut this week. More on that in a few days.........

5/13/2006 2:15:43 PM   Our MOD walk was quite a success! Almost $1300 raised between the 3 of us (um, meaning me!). I won't toot my own horn too much. All thanks goes to the many of you out there in Pigletland who generously donated. It was a really nice event and something I look forward to our family doing together each year to honor the memories of Ronan & James. I'm so glad that today was a part of Mother's Day weekend. And I returned home to flowers from all 3 of The Brothers Humphrey. Very sweet. Victor hung tough through the whole morning without losing it but was so hungry by the time we got home. While I wholeheartedly support breastfeeding anywhere and everywhere in public, it's just not something that works particularly well for us given his propensity for obsessing about any sounds or movements around him when he's trying to get in his "milk zone". So now I pay the price for staying out so long. The boy won't seem to nap. And he REALLY needs to nap so that we can go to Dada's tennis match in a bit. Sounds like Victor is most likely sitting up and beating his head against the crib rails so maybe it's time to throw in the towel and just get ready to head out for tennis. This ought to be interesting.

3/26/2006 12:13:09 AM   And today is James Thomas day. We welcomed him to the world 2 years ago at 5:38 p.m. and have held him close to our hearts ever since. Happy birthday, Little James.

3/25/2006 12:29:12 AM   Today we celebrate the birth of Ronan Woods Humphrey, our firstborn son, whose presence is felt as much today as it was 2 years ago at 2:17 p.m. when he joined this family. Thanks for our Victor, sweet Ro. Many kisses.

3/8/2006 3:49:31 PM   Thank you so much to many friends who have helped me to already surpass my MOD fundraising goal of $1,000. And there's still 2 whole months until the walk! I am truly overwhelmed at the generosity and it could not have come at a better time. Such a nice birthday tribute for Ro & JT this month. And Victor and I are actively training for the walk. He continues to happily nap as long as I stroll him so it's been a real win-win. I'm feeling so much better now that I'm getting some exercise again. I'm hearing "mama" fairly consistently now but it's always part of a crying jag and I don't think he's necessarily addressing me by name. It still breaks my heart every time I hear it though. Even when the volume is high, I just love that sweet little voice of his. I think he's quite aware of that too. He's currently napping on his tummy which is also new. He is rolling and locomoting all around that crib these days. He doesn't really totally crawl yet but it's closer to a true crawl than an army crawl. It's a crawl/scoot/roll hybrid. I've had to install a mesh bumper to keep his errant limbs out of harm's way. And once again, I've spoken way too soon. The nap is perhaps not to be. Awww. And there's the "mama" cry. I might cry myself.

2/25/2006 12:33:05 PM   James is going to be so disappointed when he wakes up from his nap (he's quite sick at the moment). Victor will eat peas after all. It does require a slight amount of trickery - specifically, sneaking pea bites in between bites of something good - but he will eat peas. In other news, he's mastered the "throw anything on the floor and Mommy will pick it up" game. Also, he can sit up. He CAN sit up. He just plain doesn't want to. He does it accidentally sometimes. We'll be staying in and resting up today but it works out well because Illinois will be playing Iowa in just a few hours. This time we will be ready in full regalia. Oskeewow-wow! I should also mention that pretty much everybody probably got an e-mail from me about our WalkAmerica team - The Brothers Humphrey. Our team fundraising page is at www.walkamerica.org/thebrothershumphrey This is the annual March of Dimes event and we will be participating in memory of Ronan and James. Any form of support our friends and family can offer - be it sponsorship at any possible level, participation in the walk itself, spreading the word about MOD's events or just remembering our sweet boys in your own way - will be so appreciated! Truly.

2/23/2006 11:59:29 AM   Victor had fun at music class yesterday. I mean like for the entire time. No 12:30 meltdown whatsoever. We were very excited to find out that our class gets to all stay together for the spring term too. It's such a great group and we would have really missed everybody if we'd had to split off. I'm very pleased to have found out that my "Mother's Story" is going to be published in La Leche's "New Beginnings" magazine. I'm not sure when yet but I'm hoping it's soon. Also, Victor's and his brothers' birth stories are included in an article in the March issue of "Parent: Wise Austin" about breastmilk donation (I was interviewed as a milk donor). I am so happy that this is all occurring as we go into March so that it can be a part of our remembrance of Ro & JT's birthdays. Definitely one of those "sometimes things happen right when you need them to" situations. And yes, I know that Michigan beat Illinois on Tuesday. I just haven't been willing to face up to it. I guess maybe it was because Victor didn't put on his outfit and watch. Sorry guys.

11/21/2005 10:33:40 PM   So here it is. The emotional seesaw of the holiday season. I am so happy and excited to be celebrating more of Victor's firsts, especially with the extended family. It's always still there though - the constant gnawing feeling that someone is missing. Ro & JT are very much on my mind and for the first time it is really hitting me that I wish they were here to see their brother growing and doing so much right now. I know most people probably don't understand that. I don't think you could understand it unless you had met Ro & JT. It's getting better though when I think back on how things were a year ago. There is so much to be thankful and joyful for and life feels very, very blessed. If only people knew how an innocent question like "Is this your first?" still feels like a dagger through the heart. He's not the first but he is the boy that came along and changed our lives into something very wonderful. Best gift ever.

9/30/2005 12:21:06 PM   Playing lots of the "Who does Victor look like today?" game here lately. It seems that he looks the most like Granddad (my daddy, that is - just annointed him "Granddad" as I typed this) here lately. Something about his facial expressions just channels a young Don Pressler. James has always felt that James Thomas looked much like Dad too and now I think I see what he means. Victor very much has James's chin though (as did Ronan, without any doubt). All of this adds up to impossible cuteness. Victor really seemed to enjoy getting out for a walk yesterday afternoon. I think we'll try to venture out after this next feeding. We'll be back up in the 90s within a few days so we've got to get out there while it's still "cool"!

7/27/2005 10:15:49 AM   False labor pains again last night but that's fine. Hopefully today will show some progress and if not, at least we're stripping membranes. Many people have been eager to tell me that this procedure can hurt a little. Bah! No really. In the words of the ever deep poet-philosopher, "haven't got time for the pain". If it gets things going, sign me up! We're taking bags to the doc just in case we go to to the hospital and Mom is on standby pending a progress report but I'm sure I'll likely be reporting back in here late this afternoon or early this evening. Tomorrow could be a good day for a birth but it's also a bittersweet one. It is the anniversary of Ro & JT's due date. I haven't blogged about them much lately but any of you that know me at all know that I would still give everything in the world to have them here right now. But I know they're rooting their bro on! He seems to be trying to kick his way out of there.

5/7/2005 3:11:19 PM   Happy Mother's Day (early)! I think I'll have a good one. Yes, it's obviously bittersweet but I also feel very, very lucky for so many things as a mother. I got to meet two amazing little guys last year that changed my life forever and are a part of my every single moment. Plus, there is much to look forward to as a mother and I'm enjoying every bit of this pregnancy. Vic & I are doing so well. The docs seem to think that if we've gotten this far without any bedrest or drugs, this is going to be pretty smooth sailing. We're having fun hanging out together all day every day. Found out from an ultrasound yesterday that he apparently turned almost head down in the past few weeks. I knew he was up to something! Thank you to Ro, JT & Veeg's daddy for helping them send me the awesome flowers I got today. He's one in a million. I can pick 'em. :) Thank you also to my family and friends for remembering me this weekend. And thank you to Aunt Deb, Uncle Pat & Cousin Sean for the great gift package today. Fun new Vic stuff to play with! Laying low this weekend trying to get us some extra rest. I am so obsessed with Victor's room now but I'm trying to stay off my feet and also trying to not spend much money yet so I am knitting away. Currently working on throw pillow covers. Hey, at least it's not more booties! Happy Mother's Day again to all of the wonderful moms out there, but especially to my mother and my Gaga who have taught me so many things I'm only beginning to discover I know.

4/24/2005 6:02:05 PM   It's almost time for the March of Dimes Walk America event here in Austin. I obviously will not be participating but I intend to walk in Ronan & James's honor (as well in memory of many other special babies including -but not limited to- Thomas, Ryan & Reagan, Jack & Kyle, Evan & Brian, Caleb, Rory, Devin & Elizabeth and Lauren) in future years. I really encourage all of my loved ones to participate in this event in your areas or to give generously to the March of Dimes. Prematurity and infant loss is not the freak occurence we all want to believe it is. Great strides have been made but there is a long, long way to go. I recently read an article in Parenting about infant loss that made an important point. That was that everyone talks about the babies that survive prematurity and go on to live healthy lives as the miracles. Those that don't get that chance are just as much tiny miracles and more people need to see it that way. Their time here is short but their impact is so great and the strength of will and character that they manage to show is truly extraordinary. Please support MOD any way you can and please support those around you that suffer such unthinkable losses by acknowledging their children. Thanks. :) http://www.walkamerica.org http://www.marchofdimes.com (If you want to support a specific team and don't know of one, here is an Austin branch of Thomas's Team, a team near and dear to my heart: www.walkamerica.org/cngraham)

3/26/2005 10:48:59 AM   James Thomas Humphrey was born a year ago today at 5:38 p.m. He weighed 1 pound, 4 ounces and was 12 inches long. The more pragmatic and calm twin, he had the cutest little mouth I've ever seen and in spite of being a preemie, somehow managed to look muscular. Always our first and second born, the twins are never far from our thoughts and forever in our hearts. They've given us so much strength and we will be better parents to Little Vic for the lessons his big brothers have taught us. Their presence will always be felt in this family and we wouldn't want it any other way. Thanks boys. Mommy & Daddy love you, always.

3/25/2005 9:14:02 AM   Ronan Woods Humphrey was born a year ago today at 2:17 p.m. He weighed 1 pound, 2 ounces and was 11 inches long. He was an amazing little guy with a lot of spirit and we were honored to share his entire short life holding him. Miss him today and every day.

3/18/2005 7:05:16 PM   I think I just felt a real kick. I mean like JUST now. Saw him again today (another NP appointment - I will spare further details) and he seems to have grown a lot in 3 days. Got to see a lot of his face today and he reminded me a lot of Ronan. He never stops moving either! Other than that, not much major news in the Humphrey household. Started a new blanket that is cloverleaf eyelet patterned. James is getting busier and busier with tennis again, both playing and crusading-wise. I really miss playing sometimes but I know it will all come back to me when I get to play again in about November (at least it will be cool then!). Cannot wait to get Vic his first racquet. That will be so cool.

3/11/2005 3:42:56 PM   Haven't had much to say but thought I'd better blog so that Genevieve won't worry that something's wrong. ;) (Sure Gen, lurk away but never sign the guestbook!). Everything's fine. Big nosebleed day. I blame the cedar pollen, more than anything. Trying to take it easy today so I can be well-rested for John & Jeanie's arrival tomorrow. The Illini game was BORING today. Sure would have been more fun if we had at least been blowing out Michigan instead of Northwestern. I believe those guys are going the distance. If nothing else, they have to just because 2005 needs to be a much better year. Nothing will make up for losing Ro & JT last year but it's time for happy things to happen for the Humphreys. It's going to take a lot of good to make up for Bush being re-elected too but I shall digress............ (It's a baby blog, Dawn, a baby blog). I feel good things coming, particularly in the little kicks (Seinfeld fans?). Finished Victor's baby booties today. Shouldn't say they're FINISHED, I guess. They still need to have their seams sewn up - a chore that requires assistance from my trusty teacher. They look pretty good. Now I'm working on gauge swatches to figure out what pattern to use for the next blankie. This is really, really addicting and I think it just might help my blood pressure a little. That and relaxing with Miss Pru. [Note to Paul: We'll fly in European cat psychoanalysts before we'll kick our furbaby to the curb. We've just been through too much together in the past 11 years.]

2/25/2005 12:10:02 PM   Being a woman and a mother, I am totally and completely fixated on dates. A year ago today we found out that Ro & JT were boys. I still remember what a total shock that was because we were so sure we had one of each in there. We were literally stunned and it actually took a few days to sink in. Once it sunk in, it was the coolest thing ever to think of two little guys terrorizing each other. I still like to think of them that way. So this time around we thought surely we'd have a girl. Piglet started to feel like a boy to me around 12 weeks mostly because his dad was so sure he was a girl. A week later we caught the first glimpse of masculinity and at 15 weeks it was conclusive. I wasn't surprised this time and I don't think James was either. Growing up I always thought that I'd have a girl right away because I love girly stuff. Now that I've become the boy machine, it really totally makes sense. I mean, let's be honest -- I've always had more guy friends than girl friends. I've spent so much of my adult life hanging out with the guys that it only makes sense that I should be a boy mommy. I just hope Piglet thinks I'm really cool!

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